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LONDON MAYOR BORIS JOHNSON appeared to prophecise the end of the capital’s black cab ‘knowledge’ route learning system, in a recent speech on technology in Boston in the United States of America.

Speaking at the British government consulate in Cambridge after bad weather forced him to cancel his speech at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT), Boris commented on how new technology was a “liberator” and would sweep away outdated working practices.

“The dawn of the tech age has been greeted with a traditional chorus of woe.”

Pity the taxi drivers’ heads stuffed with short cuts memorised over years in a phenomenal feat of pelmanism who now find that their omniscience is challenged by anyone who can work a satnav.

“Woe to the bourgeois professions who have seen the barriers to entry eliminated and the value of labour cut in half by the internet.

“Look at what is happening to the high street shops, sad and shuttered, their custom ruthlessly plundered by the internet giants, not all of whom pay anything like enough tax on their earnings.

“I understand these emotions. I am a conservative but I think the charges against the tech revolution can be more or less entirely dismissed.”

“Tech is a liberator. Tech gives power to those who were voiceless and powerless, it gives voters the right to vent their feeling, not once every five years but every day as they tweet their abuse, or even their encouragement, of politicians.”

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